Crawling
by Marron Babe
Summary: Songfic, BotanxHiei. I know this isn't one of the most popular couples, but it's my favorite. No flames please. :)~


Disclaimer: I don't make anything for this and don't own Yu Yu Hakusho and its characters or Linkin Parks' lyrics to Crawling…I wish.

Lavender eyes glanced about the scenery as she neared his home. She had been anticipating seeing him, even if only a glance of his crimson eyes. Her Hiei, the one man who'd been able to capture her heart and hold it. Though the two weren't officially dating, they could be considered a couple. Botan knew that her Hiei would never be disloyal to her, because as conceited as it sounded, she knew that not very many women were good enough to bed with him.

She smirked at the thought that she was one of the few and for now the only. She knew that those eyes were hers and no others. She knew that his growls of passion were for her ears, his touches so soft but urgent were only for her body and his kisses and whispers were only for her lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Botan knew something was bothering her or she wouldn't be seeking him out right now. She usually waited until he came to her window, not asking for permission but the soul justice of taking her as his own, which she gave so freely. A worry was pounding into her thoughts and if she knew what it was, she would say something.

They had been together almost a year, which to her surprise, Hiei had pointed out one morning after their passion filled nights. Botan had realized that the fire demon was right, they had. She smiled, he had been counting. She was planning on doing something great for him and she wondered if he felt the same way.

As she gave a light tap to his door, she waited patiently. What if he was out with Kurama training as he did so often? Perhaps he was off getting into trouble, which wouldn't surprise her. 

That was probably one of the things that caught her attention to him. She was so bored with the good guys. She hadn't had much of love in her past relationships but she knew what it was and it was flowing threw her every nerve and vein. Spreading to her heart which she held only for him.

When no answer came, Botan pressed her ear to the door. There she heard murmurs of voices. Perhaps Kurama had stopped by as he usually did? He was the only one the two had confirmed their relationship to for he was the only one to be trusted. Yusuke and the others had an idea that something may be going on between the two, but never did they utter a word of it in fear of Hiei's reply. Botan wondered if he were ashamed of her or love in general.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface  
Consuming/confusing  
This lack of self-control I fear is never ending  
Controlling/I can't seem

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shrugging away the pain filled thoughts she opened the door cautiously. Her eyes darted about the room, searching for her fire demon. She smirked to herself as shut the door behind her. Maybe she could sneak in and listen to their plans for the couple's anniversary.

Placing each step carefully, Botan made her way to the source of the voices. Yes, they were definitely Kurama and Hiei's. She walked even slower to the door, happy to see it was cracked. Knowing that the demon's bed face the opposite wall, if she were to peak inside he wouldn't see her. It was rather early in the morning, so he was most likely getting dressed. Why would Kurama be in his room though?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
(Without a sense of confidence 

And I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)  
I've felt this way before

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Botan took a deep breath, gulping down her last ounce of saliva in her dry mouth. Her stomach was curling, but not in excitement. She couldn't figure out why she was feeling so uneasy. All she was doing was checking in on him, coming to speak with him. The only problem was that Kurama was there.

She inhaled again before peering inside. She couldn't see properly and opened the door slightly, happy to hear only silence. Her fire demon kept his home in tip-top shape. She smirked at the thought, yet it quickly diminished at the sight she saw.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There he sat, under the sheets as he did after their own lovemaking, his beautiful chest bare to the world. Lying next to him, to her horror, was Kurama, his own chest bare as well. It didn't take a genius to know the sheets were the only clothing the two demons wore.

Botan felt herself becoming sick. Not at the thought of a gay couple but the sight of her lover in bed with another, being the same sex or not. She gasped as the two continued to talk as if the crime they had just committed were not a big thing. They acted so casual, as if this were a regular thing. As if they were a...couple?

Botan felt her eyes stinging with tears she knew would fall soon. Her mouth was open to scream, yet no sound came out. Backing up she stumbled on her own feet, slamming into the wall as she fell. "What was that?" came Kurama's voice. Botan let out a small sob as she climbed to her feet to bolt to the door. 

She heard them rummaging about the room behind her as she slammed the door shut angrily and ran from him and his 'lover'. She pulled out her oar and flew off, her tears leaking past her and into the wind, rushing threw her. She didn't know where she was going, just as long as it were far from Kurama and especially, Hiei.

********

Hiei's ears perked at the sound. "What was that?" asked Kurama, already getting dressed. Hiei followed suit, throwing on his black pants before going at his lighting speed to open his bedroom door. He could smell her perfume, lingering in the hall. He turned to the source of footsteps to find her bolting out the door. Kurama leaned in the doorway, his face cool as usual. 

"I suppose she saw us?" he whispered. Hiei turned to him. "You'd better go." The fox demon nodded and gracefully strode out. Hiei leaned against the wall, his thoughts swirling. How could he have been so careless? He turned to get fully dressed before taking off out of his window.

********

Rain pat against her back, pushing her further along. Lighting struck around her and she knew she'd have to land in the forest below. Letting out a defeated sigh, she landed in the thick brush, relieved to see the thick pine let no rain hit her. This was where she fell against a tree to cry, her sobs silenced by the wind whipping threw the upper limbs of the trees which hid her from anyone's presences...well almost anyone's.

********

Hiei jumped from limb to limb, his eyes dancing about the forest for a sign of her. He'd seen her land when he had leapt out of his window, but now he didn't know where she was. He landed by a small creek to wash his face. He felt himself getting sick and turned to vomit. 

He couldn't figure out why he was doing this. Because you love her, whispered a voice, nagging at the back of his mind. He shrugged it off as he continued to search, feeling horrible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Discomfort endlessly has pulled itself upon me  
Distracting/reacting  
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection  
It's haunting how I can't seem...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There she was, weeping as he suspected. She never looked more vulnerable or hurt. He walked to her, his face blank of expression. He crouched down beside her, taking her chin to lift it.

Botan knew that insistent, yet gentle touch. It was her Hiei. She looked into his blood red eyes, raindrops running down his cheeks, pulling at his hair which gave up a good fight, leaving only the highest points to curve downward. He never looked more beautiful...nor disgusting. Botan glared threw teary eyes, rain mixing with the salty droplets of water, falling down her flushed cheeks.

Hiei stared at her as rain began to break threw the trees and fall upon them. The two were concealed by the thick branches as only inches away, rain pummeled into the soft earth.

Botan gulped as she looked into those eyes she had once believed loved her. His calloused hand came to cup her own and she jerked away. He took the hint and let his hand fall to his knee. "Botan," he began. The blue haired beauty held a finger to those feather soft lips.

"No," she whispered, her voice quivering. Hiei grabbed her hand, "Botan." She rose slowly and turned away from him. "How long?" Hiei crossed his arms across his chest, growing cold once again. When he didn't answer she turned to him. "How long, Hiei? How long have you been with Kurama...how long have you been gay?" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To find myself again  
My walls are closing in  
(Without a sense of confidence 

And I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)  
I've felt this way before  
So insecure

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hiei flinched at the word "gay". He had never thought it that. Never. He turned to her with eyes so distant and cold she let out a broken sob. Falling to her knees she began to cry once again. He had been unfaithful to her...not only that but with another man! She cried out as she curled into a ball on the forest floor, sobbing broken heartedly as he scooped her up in his arms.

She tried her hardest to break free of his grasp, yet when he didn't let her go, she gave up. Curling into his shoulder, she wept. As the bumpy ride of him leaping threw the forest continued, Hiei tried to figure out what he'd say or do and when he reached Botan's bedroom, he knew nothing. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Botan felt him place her on her messy bed, her body sinking into a mass of flowered comforters and baby blue sheets. Hiei studied her broken form, shaking as tears and cries that stabbed at his very core. He didn't know whether to comfort her or leave. Not only was she sobbing but shivering and when he realized that it was because of the wet clothes that clung to her form, he leaned forward and removed her jacket as she gave no resistance. 

Botan felt her heavy, wet clothes leaving her body and she wondered what he was doing, why he wouldn't just leave. He stripped her of everything. Leaving her only nude a moment, he quickly grabbed one of her silky nightgowns and dry panties. He took a towel from her bathroom and wrapped her in it, making her sit up and face him. She refused to and continued to stare absently out the window, her tears running silently out of her puffy eyes. She was no longer crying out, but silent.

This scared Hiei. Botan was usually full of emotion, not a weeping zombie as she was now. Once he figured her body was dry enough, he effortlessly lifted her and pulled her underwear on her shapely hips. Then he pulled her nightgown over her head. He then laid her back down on the messy bed, a bed he feared he may never share with her again. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Crawling in my skin  
These wounds they will not heal  
Fear is how I fall  
Confusing what is real

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Botan pulled the comforter over her shoulder as she continued to stare out the window, her tears now diminishing into nothing. Hiei crouched in front of her view, taking her lips with his own. Botan didn't kiss back nor make any effort to show emotion for him as he pulled away. He leaned forward to her ear and whispered, "I'm sorry." With that he rose, opening her window, stepping out then leaping to the nearest trees.

Botan glared. What an ass, as punishment for making him apologize he was making her shut her window as she continued to shiver. She slowly got up and brought it closed and then, she did something she hadn't done in the past eleven months. She locked the window to prevent him from entering and locked her door as well. 

Botan lifted her phone from her beside table. The operator answered, "Yes Miss Botan?" She let out a trembling sigh before replying, "Please tell Prince Koemna that I will not be coming in tomorrow." The operator agreed. "Anything else, Miss Botan?" There was the click of the phone as she hung up. Then the only sound left amidst the howling wind was a depressing sound of a woman, crying her heart out to a man she knew did not love her...and may have never.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Confusing what is real… 

  *~*Owari*~*


End file.
